Illogical Fears

Being that I am a crazy person, I have a few illogical fears. It makes me feel better to enumerate the ways in which I'm crazy. Maybe it helps me understand it better. Also, I think it's ridiculous and funny in a way. Or it would be a lot funnier if it weren't me that was experiencing the crazy. Like, if I heard about this kind of thing on a tv channel I would find it entertaining. I'm not making anything up here, I'm genuinely afraid of these things.

So some of my fears (one's I'm not too embarrassed to share, I suppose. I won't list too many because that'll make me look REALLY crazy. Also not ones that will make it hard for me to sleep immediately after writing this.)

I can't sleep with a cat in the room. I once read this story about a folk belief that cats would creep near to a baby's crib while it slept and steal the soul of the baby, killing it. It was some kind of folk explaination for SIDS. But anyway, I just don't like cats near me when I sleep. I mean...what if they could suck my soul out while I slept? The cats in this house that I dogsit at are often sweet. Two of them love me to death...they live to curl up on my lap or just lie near me and purrrrrr. But I pick them up and move them away if I'M going to sleep. Sure they seem all sweet and innocent. But everyone knows that cats are the allies of the devil. They seriously have something evil in them, even the sweetest most gentle cats are tainted. I like cats. I just don't trust them.

baby dolls I don't trust those fixed, shiny eyes. I don't like the stiff smiles. They creep me out. I'm sure they'll move. They too would like to kill me in my sleep. This one goes WAY back, my parents just gave up on buying me baby dolls after a while...I would have these nightmares that I still remember, vivid horrible nightmares. Yeah.

bees Um, well, I was stung in the eye when I was 3. I don't remember that, but I credit it with my fear of them. I can now be in the presence of a bee as long as it's not flying AT or too NEAR me...like if it's attacking a window, or minding it's own business collecting pollen. But if it flyings at or near me, all bets are off and I am getting away and out.

bugs getting in my ears Seriously, this is the root for more than a few compulsions. Just thinking about it gets me twitchy. I had this dream once that sacks full of spider eggs hatched all over me and crawled all over me and then crawled into my ears and I could feel/hear them. Ugh.

driving or walking next to busses or trucks OMG it scares me so bad. I just give them so much space. I'm sure they'll either side swipe me or just fall over on me. They're too big!!

everyone behind me is an unmarked police car yep. That's paranoia for you. I just CAN'T speed. Because one of them is undoubtibly an unmarked car. I HATE THOSE THINGS. Gone are the days when you can trust your fellow driver!!! Now on a level this is a logical fear. But equally...it's really really paranoid.

hm, something not about driving...


nope, nope I have to stop if I'm going to sleep ok. If I keep thinking like this I'll think about the ones that have to do with sleeping, and there are a lot of those, and then I'll have a really hard time getting to sleep.

Goodnight!